Peter Crouch has no plans to hang up his boots but as he comes towards the latter end of his playing career, the former England and Liverpool striker has released an autobiography with some brilliant and often funny stories from his career at the top level.
The Stoke City forward joined Joe Molloy to talk about some of the stories featured Peter Crouch: How To Be A Footballer and some of the them involve some of his former Irish club team-mates.
"It escalated a little bit. I think it was Jon Walters who put Matthew Etherington's jacket down the toilet and he'd spent a few quid on that," he said.
"And then he retaliated by putting kippers in his shoes and hid them, so they were there for a few hours and stank.
"It culminated in Jon Walters going to the butchers and he ordered a pig's head and got it sent to the training ground and putting it in Glenn Whelan's locker.
Tottenham's Peter Crouch at Tottenham's training ground today in Chigwell, Essex. Picture by: Sean Dempsey/PA Archive/PA Images
"But Glenn Whelan then retaliated and then he put it in what he thought was Matthew Etherington's locker. It was actually Kenywn Jones' locker.
"Kenwyn is not a man to be messed with and proceeded to throw a brick through Matthew's car. So it all kicked off and what started with a bit of fun turned into anarchy."
Crouch is famously down-to-earth but he did once treat himself to an Aston Martin that drew disdainful looks from Roy Keane.
"It was never me. I should never have bought it," said Crouch of the car.
"For starters, getting in it was difficult. Once I did get in it, I just didn't feel like it was me ever. People were looking and I didn't want to be that person.
"I lived in Cheshire at the time, pulled up at the lights alongside Roy Keane of all people and I had the shades on.
"I was listening to some speed garage, my arm was out the window and Roy gave me that look that he's given many people in his time and I felt [really small] and literally as he sped off in the distance, I was sitting in this car, looked at myself in the mirror and thought I need to get rid of this. I literally got rid of the car that week."
Crouch also chatted to Joe about why he felt his England generation under-achieved, why he adored Sven Goran Eriksson and why Steven Gerrard rather than Rafa Benitez was the real person to impress when he was at Liverpool.
You can watch the full interview back on the Football Show: